Here Comes a Candle - a playtest of the first larp I've written

Maybe you began trying to fight back alone, passing out subversive literature because you couldn't bear seeing the eager young eyes that shone up at you look defeated and broken in just a few short years. 

Or maybe you began alone because one day your brother vanished, your younger brother who you promised to look out for but who you could never teach to keep his thoughts and opinions to himself. The regime were pretending he hadn't existed so you found the biggest, blankest wall you could and spray painted a memorial to him. "Murdered - gone too soon"

And maybe, as you were about to be caught, as a leaflet was about to slip into the wrong hands, someone took it and winked. Or perhaps as you were running and dodging bullets that you knew would hit you soon, someone took your hand and pulled you to safety.

The 4 of you had similar stories, of wanting to fight, of needing to fight. This was the first time in your life you realised that you weren't alone.

So, perhaps you became bolder, or perhaps you became more cautious, feeling that the 3 other people, standing defiant beside you, were your family and without them you would be lost forever. 

Did it come as a surprise when you got caught, or did you know that someday this would happen? You had all seen cruelty by this point, real cruelty. Families tortured, houses burnt and worse. All in the name of public safety. 

So why did you not expect this? When the 4 of you were pushed lost and beaten into a cell and told that you had a chance to live? That despite your activities against the state the ruler had decided to be merciful. Only one of you had to die at dawn. The 4 of you had an hour to decide who it would be, which of your family, as they had now become, would be killed.

This was playtest 1b (playtest 1a consisted of 2 people and scribbled scraps of paper).
This one I tried to present the way the finished larp would be. All the characters had a reason to live, with questions challenging it, reasons to die, with questions challenging it and a memory that bonded them to the rest of the group. They created characters from this and then the game began. 

My favourite moments were:

- About halfway through the game characters switched from arguing for their lives to arguing about why all the others in the group had better reasons to live.

- My utter frustration that one of the characters that was in love with another character was just hinting at it and not saying it outright.

- The character playing an academic started arguing rationally and then admitted that she considered the rest of the group her family and couldn't bear to lose them.

- Everyone saying goodbye to the person who was going to be executed made me feel really emotional. 

- The anger of the character who was going to die as he read the statement confessing to committing the crimes and the look of powerlessness and despair on the faces of the other characters (which was what I was trying to evoke.)

I also got some brilliant feedback after the game:

- At one point I had asked the players to announce which reason to live they had picked (although not the attendant questions). I had told them to pick out their reason to die secretly and not share it out of character. I wanted it role played and I wanted it to come as a shock within the game. Some players said that they were reluctant to mention them in game as they were unsure if they still had to be kept secret. This is something that I have to correct when I write it up.

- I emphasised in the description of the game that the characters had been engaged in civil disobedience and peaceful protest. One of the players suggested that it would be interesting if they didn't fight peacefully. 

I agree it would be an interesting exploration of when and if it is necessary to fight violence with violence but I was afraid that it would add an extra issue when the players only had an hour to make a decision. I was also afraid it would add an extra layer of complexity at the cost of some of the emotional impact. I may add some suggestions on the finished document of how the game can be altered to allow this though.

- Another suggested question for the character sheet was 'what has the regime done to you?' I'm debating adding it because:

a) Sometimes when you've lived with something all your life it's difficult to see all the wrongs that have been committed against you clearly, particularly in the context of a regime that regularly lies to people.

b)It implies one big thing had to have happened which is probably true in the case of some of the characters. However, I would also like to leave room for someone to be fighting because 'it's the right thing to do' or because they've suffered millions of 'paper cuts' and can't take it any more. Or for someone to fight as an outlet for their anger.

I'd love to play test this again. Actually, I'd love to be a player in it at some point too but I think I'll have difficulty finding the players, time and a venue,

I'm entering it for the Golden Cobra Challenge which means I can't publish it at the moment. I will put up a link to it early - mid November though so that other people can download it and play it if they wish.

I am really excited about this game, not only because it's the first larp I've written but also because of the reactions of the play testers. It works! I'm not sure I expected that!